Thanks for sharing your beautiful story! I’m about to have #6 and needed some good reminders of some things 😅😅❤️. (Plus it was fun to read, as I grew up in / still have immediate family in SD!)
I’ve thought deeply for years how God can really use birth (especially unmedicated) to strengthen us as women as we become mothers. From the entry of sin in the world / the increase in labor pains…It’s like he said, “if mothers are going to survive this world now they’ll need a little bit of a boot camp😬! Pain, hardship, doubt, the need for trust, surrender.. no avoiding these things now. Birth can have such a transformative power, thanks again for sharing your beautiful example of this. And HBD to your little one! 🎂🎉
Oh fun, where did you grow up? I have family in Phoenix, actually!
Yes, an interesting topic! I haven't quite figured out my thoughts on "the curse" etc. I'm reading a really interesting book rn called Theology of the Womb and it's really resonating with me.
Congrats to you and my best wishes for a beautiful birth!
So beautiful, Amber! Makes me want to give birth again 🥹. I’ve had three homebirths, and while all have been beautiful in their own ways, my third was by far the one where I felt most “carried” by God and if we are not blessed with another baby, it was a good one to go out on. I’m so, so glad you were able to have a healing birth experience (and an HBAC at that! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻). I don’t think homebirth is for everyone, but I do wish every woman could experience the kind of trust, surrender, and ultimate peace that you describe with this birth. And I think it’s what God wants for his daughters to experience, too.
Beautiful story! What a lovely birth! What a blessing to have such a wonderful experience to hold close to you. Happy birth-day to you and your daughter!
I get you on the birth conversations …before I gave birth the first time I thought it was so weird how some women wanted to talk about their births all the time…then I gave birth 😂 And now it’s one of my favourite types of conversation haha!!
All 3 of my births so far have been highly medical, but the second and third births were so filled with grace. My experiences have shown me that redemptive birth doesn’t have to be a home birth (which I will likely never have), and that surrender and trust are such key attitudes in the whole process.
With my first and third births I had two failed epidurals, so birthed without any pain meds. In a way, it was good because I know that I can get through birth without it (even though for my third I had a fractured tailbone so I’m pretty sure the pain was way worse than it should have been). But my second birth, I am so thankful that the epidural took because my son’s heart stopped and they had to get him out within 5 minutes…by some blessing I was already in the OR and they did the c-section in 4mins and he was breathing after one long minute.
By leaning into the attitude of surrender I can say that I am so proud of how I birthed my children. I look forward to (hopefully) more births in the years ahead of me.
And I really get the pause you wrote about!! After my first birth, I really needed a minute to myself, to come back to myself. It was the strangest feeling.
Thank you for sharing... I always get emotional reading birth stories and this one is just beautiful. I am praying for a redemptive home birth with my current pregnancy and this is definitely a reminder to hope!
I loved your story. All of your birth stories, by the way. Sharing birth stories is such a fundamental part of the healing of our culture and I see your stories doing just that. Thank you. I'd like to repost your story, later this week, or next week, if you don't mind.
This is such beautiful writing, I’m happy for you that you had a healing birth. I don’t have kids, but I really enjoy reading other women’s birth stories, particularly the ones where things go well in what seems like a wash of horror stories. The tenacity and strength of women and how our bodies can just know what to do never fails to amaze me. I can’t imagine how connected you must feel to the millions of women who have done the same thing before you, through time and through space.
What a beautiful, beautiful story, I could really feel what you were describing. I would have loved a home birth with my third but decided it wasn't the right thing for us as a family, which is good because we wouldn't have been allowed in the end anyway (I was considered high risk at the last minute due to a bleed, but everything turned out OK.)
I felt transformed by my second and third births, both were so empowering and I was so proud of myself. Both were water births, too. Like you, I truly wish more women had such an experience, rather than one of trauma. I think sharing birth stories like this one can really help change the narrative on birth, though, as women won't know to strive for better if they don't know the option for a positive experience is there
This is so beautiful to read - thank you for sharing!! And I didn’t realize your third was named Rose too - so is mine!! Three girls over here too. :)
With my Rosie I totally felt that same sensation of baby moving down the birth canal and then schloooping right back up again after the contraction ended haha. With my first I pushed three times, the second I pushed once… but with my third the pushing took forever, which I was not prepared for!
Amber, I loved reading this! Thank you for sharing, and happy birth-day to both you and your babe. What a rich depth of experience you hold!
One of the things my mother used to emphasize is just how perfect a part of labor it is for a mom to take a moment (or moments) to catch her breath after baby emerges. She used to whisper to me to just wait; if a mama wasn't ready to bring her baby up to her chest or was feeling more spacey than excited, just be silent and let the moment unfold. As a mother who had birthed many times, she knew that feeling of needing a pause after pushing quite well and felt like it was a beautiful element of the physiological process.
Oof, I almost got teary reading that. I did feel like that was one moment where my midwife was "pushy." (No pun intended, ha.) It almost felt like she was admonishing me for not wanting to catch the baby, and also like it was an emergency to get her out of the water? And then yeah, you always see these amazing pictures of the first few moments, and I was just not there. I really would have appreciated more of a patient unfolding, just a moment to get my bearings and come back to reality. And was your mother a midwife as well or just a matriarch?
Oh, I hear you! I so love birth photography, but I also think those beautiful photos can at times be so misleading, especially since the videos and photos shared end up being selected carefully to communicate something other than the full reality of the moment-by-moment birth experience (which so often does involve that pause for coming back to reality, as you put it). And yes, my mother was a midwife! She also birthed nine babies.
Thanks for sharing your beautiful story! I’m about to have #6 and needed some good reminders of some things 😅😅❤️. (Plus it was fun to read, as I grew up in / still have immediate family in SD!)
I’ve thought deeply for years how God can really use birth (especially unmedicated) to strengthen us as women as we become mothers. From the entry of sin in the world / the increase in labor pains…It’s like he said, “if mothers are going to survive this world now they’ll need a little bit of a boot camp😬! Pain, hardship, doubt, the need for trust, surrender.. no avoiding these things now. Birth can have such a transformative power, thanks again for sharing your beautiful example of this. And HBD to your little one! 🎂🎉
Oh fun, where did you grow up? I have family in Phoenix, actually!
Yes, an interesting topic! I haven't quite figured out my thoughts on "the curse" etc. I'm reading a really interesting book rn called Theology of the Womb and it's really resonating with me.
Congrats to you and my best wishes for a beautiful birth!
I grew up in Platte, along the Missouri River area 2 hours west of Sioux Falls. ❤️
Oh yes, I know Platte. We drive there sometimes to take our kids to the river. And my SIL is from there. :)
So beautiful, Amber! Makes me want to give birth again 🥹. I’ve had three homebirths, and while all have been beautiful in their own ways, my third was by far the one where I felt most “carried” by God and if we are not blessed with another baby, it was a good one to go out on. I’m so, so glad you were able to have a healing birth experience (and an HBAC at that! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻). I don’t think homebirth is for everyone, but I do wish every woman could experience the kind of trust, surrender, and ultimate peace that you describe with this birth. And I think it’s what God wants for his daughters to experience, too.
Beautiful story! What a lovely birth! What a blessing to have such a wonderful experience to hold close to you. Happy birth-day to you and your daughter!
I get you on the birth conversations …before I gave birth the first time I thought it was so weird how some women wanted to talk about their births all the time…then I gave birth 😂 And now it’s one of my favourite types of conversation haha!!
All 3 of my births so far have been highly medical, but the second and third births were so filled with grace. My experiences have shown me that redemptive birth doesn’t have to be a home birth (which I will likely never have), and that surrender and trust are such key attitudes in the whole process.
With my first and third births I had two failed epidurals, so birthed without any pain meds. In a way, it was good because I know that I can get through birth without it (even though for my third I had a fractured tailbone so I’m pretty sure the pain was way worse than it should have been). But my second birth, I am so thankful that the epidural took because my son’s heart stopped and they had to get him out within 5 minutes…by some blessing I was already in the OR and they did the c-section in 4mins and he was breathing after one long minute.
By leaning into the attitude of surrender I can say that I am so proud of how I birthed my children. I look forward to (hopefully) more births in the years ahead of me.
And I really get the pause you wrote about!! After my first birth, I really needed a minute to myself, to come back to myself. It was the strangest feeling.
Thank you for sharing... I always get emotional reading birth stories and this one is just beautiful. I am praying for a redemptive home birth with my current pregnancy and this is definitely a reminder to hope!
Aw thank you. Sending you so much love and strength! I think I’ll write another post on things that helped me prepare for the birth!
I loved your story. All of your birth stories, by the way. Sharing birth stories is such a fundamental part of the healing of our culture and I see your stories doing just that. Thank you. I'd like to repost your story, later this week, or next week, if you don't mind.
This is such beautiful writing, I’m happy for you that you had a healing birth. I don’t have kids, but I really enjoy reading other women’s birth stories, particularly the ones where things go well in what seems like a wash of horror stories. The tenacity and strength of women and how our bodies can just know what to do never fails to amaze me. I can’t imagine how connected you must feel to the millions of women who have done the same thing before you, through time and through space.
What a beautiful, beautiful story, I could really feel what you were describing. I would have loved a home birth with my third but decided it wasn't the right thing for us as a family, which is good because we wouldn't have been allowed in the end anyway (I was considered high risk at the last minute due to a bleed, but everything turned out OK.)
I felt transformed by my second and third births, both were so empowering and I was so proud of myself. Both were water births, too. Like you, I truly wish more women had such an experience, rather than one of trauma. I think sharing birth stories like this one can really help change the narrative on birth, though, as women won't know to strive for better if they don't know the option for a positive experience is there
Thank you so much for sharing
This really resonated as I approach my third birth. It’s such a mystery but worth the adventure.
This is so beautiful to read - thank you for sharing!! And I didn’t realize your third was named Rose too - so is mine!! Three girls over here too. :)
With my Rosie I totally felt that same sensation of baby moving down the birth canal and then schloooping right back up again after the contraction ended haha. With my first I pushed three times, the second I pushed once… but with my third the pushing took forever, which I was not prepared for!
Yeah, I pushed forever with my first two. It's like my babies want to take their sweet, sweet time lol.
And what?! Three girls each and the youngest with the same name? That's wild! How old are yours? Mine are newly 8, 6, and (obviously) newly 3.
Ha, that was supposed to say “my first, TOO.” (My second was a c-section.) just clarifying in case someone reading is like wait what?😅
Mine are 8, 7, and almost 2! My first two were 16 months apart, and then we took a rather long break before the third, haha.
This is the first time I’ve read this. So beautiful. I love that I got to see you right before Rosie’s birth!
Oh yay! Glad you enjoyed and yes, it was so lovely seeing you and Mike that day! Truly I think I needed that time alone and time with soul friends :)
Amber, I loved reading this! Thank you for sharing, and happy birth-day to both you and your babe. What a rich depth of experience you hold!
One of the things my mother used to emphasize is just how perfect a part of labor it is for a mom to take a moment (or moments) to catch her breath after baby emerges. She used to whisper to me to just wait; if a mama wasn't ready to bring her baby up to her chest or was feeling more spacey than excited, just be silent and let the moment unfold. As a mother who had birthed many times, she knew that feeling of needing a pause after pushing quite well and felt like it was a beautiful element of the physiological process.
Thank you for your kind words, Jan.
Oof, I almost got teary reading that. I did feel like that was one moment where my midwife was "pushy." (No pun intended, ha.) It almost felt like she was admonishing me for not wanting to catch the baby, and also like it was an emergency to get her out of the water? And then yeah, you always see these amazing pictures of the first few moments, and I was just not there. I really would have appreciated more of a patient unfolding, just a moment to get my bearings and come back to reality. And was your mother a midwife as well or just a matriarch?
Oh, I hear you! I so love birth photography, but I also think those beautiful photos can at times be so misleading, especially since the videos and photos shared end up being selected carefully to communicate something other than the full reality of the moment-by-moment birth experience (which so often does involve that pause for coming back to reality, as you put it). And yes, my mother was a midwife! She also birthed nine babies.
So beautiful!
Thank you Sarah; thanks for reading.
Ohh Amber I loved reading this so much. Thank you for sharing. What a beautiful story of trust and surrender and power.
My second birth story has a lot of similarities to your story and I am totally with you on the life changing power of birth!
Thank you Becca. It really is life-changing.